Emotional mess


Ok, so…I am generally an emotional person. It’s kinda my dorky thing. I get teased a lot for not acting even slightly like a Capricorn. Only, lately, I am even more emotional than usual. I love people and I just feel things all the time.

I have been sleeping to avoid the weird overload I am feeling. I don’t mind being aware of touching or moving things, but lately it is like an overload of happy and sad. I need balance people! Balance. So, my candy corn solution is sleeping. I gotta stop sleeping and make a better plan.

I have been thinking about what I want my future Christmases to look like. They don’t look like my current one, though, I have no complaints. I just have this crazy instinct to create moments. Make my own traditions. Implement crazy laughter inducing rituals of love and hand-holding. I want, just once, to have someone come home to a lighted Christmas tree and presents. Music playing and a much dreaded but grugingly worn Santa hat of doom. Oh, and me. Me waiting there with a goofy grin and apple cider, and a movie marathon tradition that I just implemented as a new Christmas tradition. Did I mention there would be Pie and other people? People also forced to wear Santa hats of doom, and watch movie marathons. People with overnight bags and bedrooms made up special, just for them. Welcoming hugs that signal they are appreciated, and lots and lots of teasing.

Sigh*** Something is really wrong with me. My goofy love meter is on high and I can’t shut it off.

I need ice cream.

 

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